假如，我是说假如哈!

　　乔布斯( Steve Jobs， 上图，苹果公司已故总裁与联合创始人) 去考托福，那么会发生什么呢，乔布斯又能得多少分呢?( 此处是假设，因为实际上他不用考托福， 他是美国公民，因此他只需要考SAT，至于他SAT考了多少分吗，有兴趣的同学可以自行搜索)，你觉得他的写作能拿满分30分吗?

　　我们来看一道机经题，下面是一道托福考试的独立写作题，限30分钟之内写300词以上：

　　Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

　　Failure is the mother of success.

　　上过Sam老师课的同学很快就能判断出来这是一个含抽象名词的现象证明类题目，那么这道题如果给Steve Jobs，他会怎么答呢?最好的答案莫过于他2005 年在Stanford毕业典礼上的演讲稿了。那么我们就来分析一下他这篇举世闻名的演讲稿的第二部分Love&Loss:

　　I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

　　幸运的是，我在很小的时候就发现自己喜欢做什么。我在 20 岁时和沃兹(Woz，苹果公司创始人之一)在我父母的车库里办起了苹果公司。我们干得很卖力，十年后，苹果公司就从车库里我们两个人发展成为一个拥有 20 亿元资产、4,000 名员工的大企业。那时，我们刚刚推出了我们最好的产品─ Macintosh 电脑─那是在第 9 年，我刚满 30 岁。可后来，我被解雇了。你怎么会被自己办的公司解雇呢?是这样，随著苹果公司越做越大，我们聘了一位我认为非常有才华的人与我一道管理公司。在开始的一年多里，一切都很顺利。可是，随后我俩对公司前景的看法开始出现分歧，最后我俩反目了。这时，董事会站在了他那一边，所以在 30 岁那年，我离开了公司，而且这件事闹得满城风雨。我成年后的整个生活重心都没有了，这使我心力交瘁。

　　I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

　　一连几个月，我真的不知道应该怎么办。我感到自己给老一代的创业者丢了脸─因为我扔掉了交到自己手里的接力棒。我去见了戴维帕卡德(David Packard，惠普公司创始人之一)和鲍勃;诺伊斯(Bob Noyce，英特尔公司创建者之一)，想为把事情搞得这么糟糕说声道歉。这次失败弄得沸沸扬扬的，我甚至想过逃离硅谷。但是，渐渐地，我开始有了一个想法─我仍然热爱我过去做的一切。在苹果公司发生的这些风波丝毫没有改变这一点。我虽然被拒之门外，但我仍然深爱我的事业。于是，我决定从头开始。

　　I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

　　虽然当时我并没有意识到，但事实证明，被苹果公司炒鱿鱼是我一生中碰到的最好的事情。尽管前景未卜，但从头开始的轻松感取代了保持成功的沉重感。这使我进入了一生中最富有创造力的时期之一。

　　During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the world’s first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

　　在此后的五年里，我开了一家名叫 NeXT 的公司和一家叫皮克斯的公司，我还爱上一位了不起的女人，后来娶了她。皮克斯公司推出了世界上第一部用电脑制作的动画片《玩具总动员》(Toy Story)，它现在是全球最成功的动画制作室。世道轮回，苹果公司买下 NeXT 后，我又回到了苹果公司，我们在 NeXT 公司开发的技术成了苹果公司这次重新崛起的核心。我和劳伦娜(Laurene)也建立了美满的家庭。

　　I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

　　我确信，如果不是被苹果公司解雇，这一切决不可能发生。这是一剂苦药，可我认为苦药利于病。有时生活会当头给你一棒，但不要灰心。我坚信让我一往无前的唯一力量就是我热爱我所做的一切。所以，一定得知道自己喜欢什么，选择爱人时如此，选择工作时同样如此。工作将是生活中的一大部分，让自己真正满意的唯一办法，是做自己认为是有意义的工作;做有意义的工作的唯一办法，是热爱自己的工作。你们如果还没有发现自己喜欢什么，那就不断地去寻找，不要急于做出决定。就像一切要凭著感觉去做的事情一样，一旦找到了自己喜欢的事，感觉就会告诉你。就像任何一种美妙的东西，历久弥新。所以说，要不断地寻找，直到找到自己喜欢的东西。不要半途而废。

　　看完了这篇荡气回肠的独立写作response，让我们来分析一下乔帮主到底答得怎么样。

　　乔布斯在语言上亲切，直接，简单，优雅，一如苹果的产品一般。

　　他的演讲主体运用了“ 三分法”，给学生讲了三个故事，而这三个故事对应他人生的不同阶段：从出生到大学辍学阶段;从创立苹果公司、 被苹果公司解雇到重回苹果公司阶段;身患癌症以及面对死亡的阶段。

　　上文选自其中第二个故事，即他被苹果公司解雇给他事业带来的意想不到的正面影响。 很显然，Jobs对于Failure is the mother of success.这个论题毫不犹豫地站在了Agree的立场上了。

　　按照托福官方独立写作的评分标准，对于乔布斯的这篇文章，可以做如下评价：

　　首先，紧扣主题&结构清晰： 结构完整——共五段

　　首段扣题： 自述失败经历(事例法开头)——被苹果解雇;

　　第二至第四段：讲述失败如何带来成功;

　　末段总结主题，给出建议：不要放弃，要找到自己心爱的事业并为之奋斗;

　　其次，例证充分：字数充足(600 词);以自身为例，例子详细生动，逻辑合理，充满感情;

　　然后，语言自然，词汇恰当(例如vision，diverge，renaissance等)，且句型多变(如祈使句、虚拟语气等)。

　　那么，如果诸位是rater的话，乔布斯的这篇文章你会打多少分呢?

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